Now Where Did I Put My Valium...

I woke up this morning with the familiar anxiety that I experience every single time I have to fly overseas. You would think that after years of travel, I would have this mastered but I don't. Instead, on the day that I am to take off, I find myself running the most ridiculous errands.

• GO TO SAM'S CLUB AND BUY NEW LUGGAGE. Look, I know that I would have been better served doing this yesterday but I had my final appointment with Dr. Sexy Metro Boy (sigh). Following that, I had the lousy idea of registering my new car and the two motorcycles since all of my temporary plates would expire before I got home. That process took me a mere three hours to complete and my left eyelid is still twitching from the experience.
• GO TO BANK AND TAKE OUT EMERGENCY FUNDS FOR NANNY. I don't know why I do this because invariably, the money is spent on pizza or fast food and it makes me a little crazy. I have encouraged trips to the grocery store but apparently, organic is spelled C-h-e-f- B-o-y-a-r-d-e-e.
• CALL AT&T AND HAVE INTERNATIONAL PLAN ADDED TO IPHONE. I have read different things on the net about how lame the international plan is but I have yet to experience the oxymoron that is AT&T's customer service. Is it any wonder I have procrastinated? Stay tuned.
• GO TO OFFICE. GET FILES. PRINT BOARDING PASS. TRY TO BE INVISIBLE. As usual, I have forgotten files in my office that I absolutely need on this trip. I would be better served tattooing "kick me" on my forehead and then parking myself behind a mule.
• BUY GIFTS FOR MY FRIENDS IN HONG KONG. This causes me more stress than just about anything. These people live in one of the best shopping meccas on the planet so finding something unique that suits their personalities is always a challenge. When you combine this with the fact that most American consumer products are made in, well... ASIA.... you see my difficulty.

So, I'm stressed out. Whatever. I understand that this is completely self-induced and could have been avoided if I had been more organized. Blah, blah, blah. Late this afternoon, whether I am prepared or not, I'll be driving like a maniac in an effort not to miss my plane to Los Angeles. While you are sleeping tonight, I'll be flying over the Pacific trying to control the urge to smother the guy next to me who invariably, will be snoring louder than a freight train. Ambien, anyone?